it's nice to meet you. I'm experiencing a similar issue. Have you found a solution yet?

in my case, It seems like the topology refresh is working correctly, but the connectionWatchdog keeps trying to reconnect with the old IP address.

My current settings are as follows:
enablePeriodicRefresh(true)
enableAllAdaptiveRefreshTriggers()
dynamicRefreshSources(true)
autoReconnect(true)

and, I am using DirContextDnsResolver for the dnsResolver